Daughter, until I saw your silhouette
in the second-story window
of the darkening room,
waif in a flannel gown,
silent and still as a night bird
hidden in one of the maples outside,
I thought loss of innocence was
a complete definition of sadness
I could hear the children
of the neighborhood
outside our new house
playing red light/green light
under the two tall street lights,
the voices of their younger
sisters and brothers chattering
in the shadows on the lawns,
and sensed your longing
as you stared down on them,
fingers laying flat
on the white wood of the sill
The therapists declared I needed
to be firm with a child
who knew no boundaries,
bedtime was bedtime,
and I curse them now,
seeing the back of you again
in that window frame
as soft and compliant
as a blade of grass
after dew falls,
feeling in my soul
the sadness of not saying,
“yes”